The kids

Actually let me introduce my babies....

First there is Antonio, soon to be 13

He's not that buff, he flexed on purpose for the picture...
he thinks he's hot stuff now that he has a four pack!! LOL

Then there's Kim

She's 9. She loves My Scene Barbie dolls and Raven Simone from the Cosby's. Now she has the show "That's So Raven" She's my lil baby doll.

And then the baby that I thought I couldn't have....


Destiny aka SugarLump. She's 5 months. When the doctor's told me I was pregnant with her I was like "Yeah, Right." But that's another post....

Yep She reminds me how fast they grow up.


Don'tcha miss the good ole days.. I sometimes wish they could have stayed this small. *sigh*
They are my very own personal motivators, true loves, nervewrackers, money spenders, who also make me work at being a better person so that I can be worthy of their love.

Now I am preparing myself for stage 2... Teenagerhood.

Homework

Ugggh!!!! I love my kids to death but man.... helping with homework will bring a momma to tears sometimes. Good Goodness!! I think that helping my daughter with her homework is starting to give me the shakes or something. Its like the very thought of the stuff makes the muscles in my neck tight and my stomach turn. There have been times where I have called my Grandma in tears crying "Oh God its all my fault! Their father has genetically passed on the stupid gene!!" LOL I'm just kidding. (no I'm not) The worst part of it is she is so devilishly cute that its hard to get mad at her even when she is obviously giving me a hard time. Thank God for my stamina. She's coming along though... slowly but surely.

Death of a Rapist

Happy Mothers Day everyone. I had a uncannily wild celebration of mother's day. I got together with the girls and partied till I drank enough liquor to have a pretty decent hangover.
Last night my fiance's Uncle died. When we heard the news this morning we kinda looked at each other and then said "Oh well". I know its kinda harsh to be so nonchalant about the loss of a life but the please let me explain. I was molested and raped by two out of three of my mothers husbands. Its one of those things that happen to you, that you survive and never forget. I have really tried to live my life not as a victim statistic but as a person that doesn't "look" like the type that that sort of thing happens to. In truth my hiding from the effects of my own rape has done nothing to remedy the emotional damage and baggage that rape does to everyone. But enough about me... This man that I am describing viciously raped and sodomized his very own blood 9 year old daughter to the point where she had to be taken to the hospital and put back together. And just recently he told my man's sister "You know family pussy is the best pussy." I mean he was a serious degenerate.
His daughter that he raped is physically a very beautiful dark skinned woman with almond shaped eyes, full lips, and cute pointy nose. She has what us black folks call "good hair", the kind that is jet black thick and curly like a baby's. Unfortunately though she has a crack head baby daddy and routinely sells her body to support his habit. She is also one of those types of people that you know when they are in the house because of the super loud and obnoxious voice that you can't help but recognize. In short she is a hoodrat's hoodrat. I remember she was over my house not too long ago cussing and swearing at her mother because she was horrified that she would let her father babysit one of her son's. Well last night she went out with us and when she returned home her babydaddy was sitting on the couch watching tv and her father was dead on the hall way floor. One can't help but wonder what her life would have been like if this man had not decided to take her innocence away from her. I wonder what she dreamed of becoming and what she thought life would be like for her when she grew up. I know not all rapists the same but nothing can give this girl back what he stole. Happy Mothers Day baby. Happy Mothers Day.